Tuesday 20 September 2011

I miss that February

     When I scroll down the mouse till the end of this blog .. tears falls down , cheeks always wet bacause of tears.I did blogging about you down there right?And you read it :) Itu cerita masa kita masih berbunga2 <3 No more you that could wipe these tears.Wish that I could turn back to February .. the month that you proposed me to be you baby :') Ayie .. you taught me everything.You taught me what is FRIEND,what is RESPECT,what is LIFE and what is LOYALTY. I know .... blog isn't a private diary,but where should i let this all out ?

   Don't ever blame yourself if one day you miss me,and i will keep on blaming my self when every time I miss you.Because I'm the one that pushed you too much.I can't heal this perpetually embedded sad feelings.You are a kind man Hafifi..I can't be able to soothe your every hurts as I promised you that day.Both of us didn't cheat on each other .. It's just .. the condition of both of us.Tearing us apart day by day ..

   My Cayie rabbit , who else could it be than you in my life?My sister said-Adik,your Mr.Right is OUT of your world,one day you will have one- But what can I do when I've gave you all... my heart ?You are just not like the others.You kind,you know me well,you know how to cheer me up.I really miss you ayie .. Remember what you told me ? You gonna be my hero forever,and if we stuck on a fight,we gonna settle it down,remember that ?

  Rindu Ayie say morning baby,good night mybaby .. and text me I love you baby.Teringat Ayie letak botol air suam suruh letak di perut sebab segugut period :( I remember that moment when we holding hands,jalan-jalan di area Bukit Bintang .. Ayie kasi beli icecream turki :) Makan sama2 d chicken rice bb .. I dont know .. and I'm wondering whether this tears will falls down as soon as  touched down at KKIA.. because you are the one , standing over there , gave me a smile before I fly back to KL .. sampai KKIA.. mesti teringat balik kan ?

  Rindu mau naik bus sama ayie,jalan kaki panas2 sama ayie.Dari nda pandai naik bus.. sampai pandai naik bus :') I miss everything about you .. laughing on the phone till 3am,rindu ayie suap nasi goreng sambil cakap 'I love you baby'..rindu semuanya... Kita berdiri d kedai newspaper tunggu hujan redahh,sini kan kita haritu ?? ..

  Know that I wont get you back because of certain causes that forces us to breakup .. Aku sayang ayie,ayie banyak  ajar mcm mana hormat orang , kawan2.. jaga perkataan di facebook semua .. Ya Allah kalau lah kita boleh sama2 balik .. untu kebahagiaan ayie , aku hormat keputusan bersama .. kalau ayie happy .. aku happy .. ayie sendiri cakap .. hati aku kuat boleh move on .. rindunyaaa mau hantar mcD d tempat ayie kerja :( mau bbm .. lagu2 yang ayie send aku dengar setiap malam .. gambar2 aku nda delete sebab semua tu kenangan kita .. kalau ada jodoh .. nda kan ke mana , aku tunggu .. kalau bukan di dunia tapi di akhirat .. Apa yang ayie pernah ajar sama aku .. aku simpan buat pengajaran selalu ..

                                          First picture taken by you , aku simpan selamanya ..

                                                                   I love you Ayie ..

Ayie suruh bahagiakan orang tua dulu daripada membahagiakan cinta .. yes aku akan buat orang tua aku senang .. aku move on .. aku tahu , satu hari nanti , ayie akan sebut nama aku dalam hati :) Ayie doakan yang terbaik untuk masa depan aku , aku pun doakan Ayie bahagia selalu bila dapat yang baru .. tuhan yang menentukan .. I miss you so much dear .. 202 hari kita bercinta , kekal selamanya kira ingat selalu , terima kasih banyak membimbing dari start keburukan sampai lah baik .. tutup hati ni untuk siapa2.. masa depan yang ayie suruh akan aku kejar untu kebaikan aku .. Jadi lah yang terbaik untuk keluargamu .. :')

Sunday 28 August 2011

Happened On The Year I Was Born

In 1993, the world was a different place.
There was no Google yet. Or Yahoo. Or Facebook, for that matter.
In 1993, the year of your birth, the top selling movie was Jurassic Park. People buying the popcorn in the cinema lobby had glazing eyes when looking at the poster.
People were indeed watching movies in the cinema, and not downloading them online. Imagine the packed seats, the laughter, the excitement, the novelty.
Do you know who won the Oscars that year? The academy award for the best movie went to Schindler's List. The Oscar for best foreign movie that year went to Belle Époque. The top actor was Tom Hanks for his role as Andrew Beckett in Philadelphia. The top actress was Holly Hunter for her role as Ada McGrath in The Piano. The best director? Steven Spielberg for Schindler's List.
In the year 1993, the time when you arrived on this planet, books were still popularly read on paper, not on digital devices. Trees were felled to get the word out. The number one US bestseller of the time was The Bridges of Madison County by Robert James Waller. Oh, that's many years ago. Have you read that book? Have you heard of it? Look at the cover!
In 1993... The European Community eliminates trade barriers and creates a European single market. EuroNews is launched in Europe. Douglas Hurd is the first high-ranking British official to visit Argentina since the Falklands War. Salvatore Riina, the Mafia boss known as 'The Beast', is arrested in Palermo, Sicily after 23 years as a fugitive. Janet Reno is selected by President Clinton as Attorney General of the United States. Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms agents raid the Branch Davidian compound in Waco, Texas, with a warrant to arrest leader David Koresh on federal firearms violations. Id Software releases Doom, a seminal first-person shooter that uses advanced 3D graphics for computer games. Jiang Zemin becomes President of the People's Republic of China. A nuclear accident occurs at Tomsk 7 in Russia. Laurence Powell and Stacey Koon are found guilty in the second Rodney King trial. Eritrea and Monaco gain entry to the United Nations. U.S. President Bill Clinton orders a cruise missile attack on Iraqi intelligence headquarters in the Al-Mansur District of Baghdad, in response to the attempted assassination of former U.S. President George H. W. Bush during his visit to Kuwait in mid-April. The Campaign for Homosexual Law Reform succeeds in having the Irish sodomy law reformed. Canadian software specialist Peter de Jager publishes in Computerworld U.S. weekly magazine an article Doomsday 2000, which is the first known reference to Y2K, the 2000 Year problem. The video game of the day was Virtua Fighter.
That was the world you were born into. Since then, you and others have changed it.
The Nobel prize for Literature that year went to Toni Morrison. The Nobel Peace prize went to Nelson Mandela and Frederik Willem de Klerk. The Nobel prize for physics went to Russell Alan Hulse and Joseph Hooton Taylor, Jr. from the United States for the discovery of a new type of pulsar, a discovery that has opened up new possibilities for the study of gravitation. The sensation this created was big. But it didn't stop the planets from spinning, on and on, year by year. Years in which you would grow bigger, older, smarter, and, if you were lucky, sometimes wiser. Years in which you also lost some things. Possessions got misplaced. Memories faded. Friends parted ways. The best friends, you tried to hold on. This is what counts in life, isn't it?
The 1990s were indeed a special decade. The Nineties saw the beginnings of the World Wide Web, originating at CERN. Email becomes popular. The Soviet Union dissolved. Living standards in East Asia and Europe generally improved. The Cold War ends. Iraqi forces invade Kuwait. A UN coalition force led by the US was sent to the Persian Gulf, and aerial bombing of Iraq began. The Kosovo War took place. The Ethiopian Civil War ends. Dolly, a sheep, is cloned. The Global Positioning System GPS becomes fully operational. Genetically engineered crops are developed for commercial use. Intel develops the Pentium processor. The Java programming language is created. Microsoft released Windows 95. In Los Angeles, riots occur after the police brutality case involving Rodney King. Great Britain hands sovereignty of Hong Kong to China. East Timor breaks away from Indonesian control. US president Bill Clinton was involved in the Lewinsky scandal. Dogme 95 becomes an important artistic movement in European film. Teen soap Beverly Hills 90210 has its long run. Baywatch becomes the most watched show in history. On MTV, reality television makes its beginning. Nelson Mandela is elected president of South Africa. Germany was reunified. The prediction of computer bug Y2K spreads fear.
Do you know what was on the cover of Life that year?
There's a kid outside, shouting, playing. It doesn't care about time. It doesn't know about time. It shouts and it plays and thinks time is forever. You were once that kid.
When you were 9, the movie Return to Never Land was playing. When you were 8, there was Cats and Dogs. When you were 7, there was a Disney movie out called Atlantis: The Lost Empire. Does this ring a bell?
6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... it's 1993. There's TV noise coming from the second floor. Someone turned up the volume way too high. The sun is burning from above. These were different times. The show playing on TV is Walker, Texas Ranger. The sun goes down. Someone switches channels. There's Beavis and Butt-Head on now. That's the world you were born in.
Progress, year after year. Do you wonder where the world is heading towards? The technology available today would have blown your mind in 1993. Do you know what was invented in the year you were born? The Global Positioning System. The Blue LED.
Is it June or late September?
Is it 1993?
Could you help me to remember?
Is this how I'm supposed to be?
...
That's from the song Cigarettes by King's X.
In 1993, a new character entered the world of comic books: Hellboy. Bang! Boom! But that's just fiction, right? In the real world, in 1993, Kasumi Ishikawa was born. And Jennifer Stone. Parimarjan Negi, too. And you, of course. Everyone an individual. Everyone special. Everyone taking a different path through life.
It's 2011.
The world is a different place.
What path have you taken?

Friday 26 August 2011

A Present From Sister-Suzie Wong

   Okay years ago .. she was so mean towards me.She's fierce like my dad.Perhaps .. she treated me like that because I was just a kid.Yeah I was so mischievous,rebellious heart when I was a around 13 to 15.Both of us keep nagging on each other almost everyday.Ouh I still remember .. she did kicked me and slapped my head because someone told her that I was hangin' out with a guy and It was actually my girl friend(tomboy/pengkid) friend.LOL !!!


  Though she didn't treat  me nicely..she still cares about my PMR.She used to teach me everything about mathematics since I am super weak on that subject.And thank god I'm passed on that subject.Well that was the last time I lived in a same house with her.She moved to KL with his husband after getting married.Only my mom,second sister and I left on Sabah.Time flies very fast..two years without her around me was very challenging enough to make myself more mature than before.Well yeah you know my fears was only with her.No one can beat my stubborn head unless her.Pfftt!

  I'm pretty sure that she could see even a little maturity on me , upon reaching the age of seventeen. She was much criticized on me about the way I talked on Facebook.Well you know ... youngsters can easily get influenced by peers.Teenagers makes the language of harsh words as their delivery language.I was one of them.I always post something like " Hell yeah bitch ! no one cares about you , fuck off you little bastard ! " Euwww this is so embarrasing,makes me blushing if I recall everything about my own stupidity.Bhahahaha !

  I admit that there's lotsa advantage to hear her anger words about my shameful behaviors.She was about to change me to be a nice girl BUT the way she handle it was a bit harsh for a young girl,a girl in the midst of searching for a permanent nice identity.The more I grow,the more I change.She can understands me well now.I started to get compability with her since I've changed a bit.

 Since I managed to get an offer study from UiTM,she gave me a special present.It's a branded 'GUESS' hand watch.She bought it for a price of Rm600.I'm so happy.Appreciate it so much.My endeavor worth it.Not in vain to study smart.Most of my times.I've spend it more on reading and writing important notes.Rest of it was watching my favorite shows,sleeping and eating.haha.This is it ...

                                                              my new hand watch :)






                                                   And this my fierce+funny sister......
                                So .. all of hard works will get something valuable to worth it :)
 

Monday 22 August 2011

The Beginning Of Life

     Seems like this is the real first step in my life.I'm a bit nervous.I'm wondering whether I can appreciate this precious gift from god.This is P-R-I-C-E-L-E-S-S ... Right now,I'm so happy :) no words can describe this beautiful feelings.I believe that in a month of Ramadhan,every prayers will be blessed by god.And prayers of my parents have been heard by the Al-Mighty.Alhamdulillah,I am so happy to tell yeah guys that I am accepted and officially a student of UiTM.I succeed to be accepted in UiTM for second intake.


    I always get what I want.If I didn't get something that I want,sooner or later I am sure I'll own it.Almost everything ! Course that I've selected is Diploma In Public Admin.Since UiTM in Sabah didn't have any faculty of law,I prefer for public admin as my foundation to proceed my further study on law course(for degree).This is the only way for me to achieve my ambition.

    It was 10:30 , As I arrived home,I was on the rush to the toilet.Felt so relieved after urination.hahaha.And I sat on this chair.Switched on the laptop.When I was facebooking...chating and stuff..suddenly I got a call from Yana.She screamed out loud ! She said " Azreena ko dapat masuk UiTM kk .. aku sudah check tadi , ko pergi lah check kalau x percaya ". I was like oh my god, thank god I am accepted.This is my big dream ! Long time of waiting finally ended dude ! To be sure,I've checked the UiTM's website to satisfy myself.And yes I AM ACCEPTED.

                                                  Hell jyeah this is it ! That's ma name :D


  Thanks to my mom .. she always keep on praying for me , thanks to my best friend Yana, Without you I won't be accepted  there . And for my sisters , some of them keep nagging at me everyday when I was still in high school, now I can see why y'all mad at me.This is the best result of our life IF we do study hard without the tedium.Now I can see my mom a bit calm.She hugged me , she kissed my cheeks side to side, though I just got 4A's for my SPM,It's worth enough to qualify me to the ivory tower :) Ini lah rezeki bulan ramadhan .. alhamdulillah ...


                                                    Next stories will be updated soon.Bye

Saturday 20 August 2011

Hangout with family before Raya

Huff ... seems like yesterday was the most tiring day in my life.We went out from house a bit late cause my dad gotta send my both nephew and niece to the tuition center since my eldest sister was a bit busy to handle it.So it took almost one hour an half to be there at the destination.As we arrived there at Bukit Bintang,we park our car .. errkk I dont know how to explain to you . It's like a bigggggg parking lot,so you can park your car in every parking lots provided.It cost rm7 only per day.Then my mom and I,we both keep holding hands walking through the BB street.Same goes to my sister and her husband.They are always our Romeo and Juliet.Ihihihi.My dad?ohh he's always alone when walking.He's always walking behind or in front of us alone.I don't know why , memang sejak aku kecil lagi memang aku perasan dia macam tu , dia suka berjalan dengan bebas.

    So.. the journey started from Sungei wang .. Kami jalan .. jalan ... and jalan .. mulanya kami cari kasut my mother , and dalam masa yang sama , aku pun ambil kesempatan untuk shopping sendiri-sendiri.Shops di Sungei Wang banyak yang murah-murah , sometimes all the price tags are rm10,rm25,rm30.Murah kan ? It's okay lah though It's not a branded clothes,just boutiques yang full of -made from korea and china- And I feel like I wanna die , my both legs macam mau patah berjalan .. because my mom punya heels saja.Dia sangat-sangat memilih , She wants to match the heels color with her baju kurung raya.Sampai dia pun bawa baju kurung dia , and every time she wants to choose for a heels , she took our her baju kurung and match it with the heels. Hahaha


                                                      Don't you see that ? Hahahahah

                                       Another heels that she matched with her Baju Kurung

                                   Sis Suzie supposed to buy that blinkblink heels.Tapi x jadi

                                                            That's my chubby sister

                                           Took this when I was in the car.Ramai orang jalan





     And .. we book a place for Iftar , It was at BB Hainan Chicken Rice , Kinda nice place , facing the BB street so you could see thousands of humans walking around the street.We ate lotsa chicken rice.We was upstairs.My dad yang baca doa berbuka puasa , kami mengaminkannya dan melantak segala makanan yang ada , ngehehe ,the bill was sponsored by Kak suji .. Thanks kak .. love you.

                                                         BB Hainan Chicken Rice
                                                                Habis licin ni semua !





    So after that kami jalan pergi Lot 10 and Pavillion .. sepanjang perjalanan tu sangat-sangat sesak , sampai berlanggar bahu . Untuk menghilangkan rasa penat , kami pun singgah lah pegi stall ice cream Ala Turka .. which is one of magic ice cream .. tunggang mcm mana pun x jatuh jugak ice tu. hahaha.Semua makan ice cream. Such a sweet moment for me and my family :')

                              This is mine,and suddenly I miss my hubby :( he likes this ice cream
                                                             With beloved mom
                                                      wanna play with that snake ?



And finally mom found a beautiful heels at Tangs Pavillion .. but I didn't captured it la,nampaknya misi untuk mencari heels mama sudah selesai.Kalau tidak,sampai besok lah kami pusing-pusing satu mall kan.And I've found something too.It's my new baby .. my handbad , jenama Catwalk . yeppi thanks mom , I gotta new one for raya,ngehehe.
                                            My new Catwalk handbag, tenkiu mom

    

          Kami keluar dari pavii dalam jam 10stengah .. lewat kan , masuk shopping mall pagi , sekali keluar malam sudah . And masa balik tu abg naley bawa kami singgah Taman Tun Dr Ismail untuk makan nan di restoran Mumtaz, Nan di mumtaz memang perghhh sedappp .. macam makan pizza hut jak.

                                                                   Try lah , sedappp !

                                                                  Me and Suzie


So guys enough untuk update kali ni , I'm too tired , Have a good night sleep .. selamat berpuasa.XoXo !!

Thursday 11 August 2011

Dreams and a wish

         Have you ever had a moment when you're sitting  alone in a comfort and quite place , you laying down daydreaming and wish that a miracle will make it come true one day .. well I did.When I was a kid,I was too much affected by looney tunes cartoons,Disney Channels,Princess stories and stuff..So when my teachers asked me "Azreena , can you tell me what's your dreams or your ambition?". Well I'll answer them " I wanna be a beautiful mermaid,or a lovely fairy or..a princess where all the citizens of the country love me like I am their one and only heart"Cause that what I did everyday,having a daydreaming  to be exactly like what I've seen on the Tv screen.Teachers just laughed at me cause they know I was just a kid..Maybe by uploading some related pictures about my dreams, It will make you know what is the feeling to be a mermaid,princess or a beautiful fairy :P


                                                               One of my dreams

                                                                 Ouch Its too sexy






               When I was growing up,the situation is much changed.I see my sisters get married,have children,get wealth and happiness.I consider them as an experiment in my life.They impressed me.But it all started from an attempt.The days I'm more mature,wishful fantasy were also changed.I dreamed to become a lawyer.Outfit as lawyer shows respected characters and I really adore it.I tried as maximum as I can to get a decent result , to bring up to standard myself taking the law course.Alhamdulillah,my SPM result satisfactory.And currently I'm waiting for the second intake of UiTM.I hope there's a little space left for myself there...Hmm..


       The next dreams are to live happily without enemies,fights,suspicion,envy and gossip.Everything should be about an immortal love between us.Since I have problems with some friends,I am very depressed.I wondered where the wrong.I can't function the same when you aren't my friend anymore.Sometimes friends do not listen to us wholeheartedly.They just keep on talking about your badness instead of knowing you well ..Sometimes I dream to live forever with my families cause they are the most understanding people that we have.Especially the one that we called MOM.I hope some broken links can be repaired again.How beautiful life if we are friends and family until the end of life..I also hope to get a spouse who love me as the way I am , care about me , lead me to the right way and changed me to the best.I put a high expectations on my own self to get a shining bright future.Have you ever dreamed of being a mother?Children and husband always there to heal the sadness.You treat your children like your mom treated you with an incomparable love.I would also like to feel the luxury and convenience which is owned by successful woman.




   I choose to live happily.I choose to love each other alive.I choose to stay at luxurious home.I choose to have a loving husband.I choose to make my mother smile when it comes to my convocations day.I choose to be a successful women.I prefer to be in the right places.I choose to achieve my ambition.I choose to be subsidiary of the best.I choose to take care of my mother when she is ill.I choose to give sufficient comfort to my mother.I prefer to make my father proud of my success.I choose to be a mother who can educate my children.I hope for a happy marriage.I CHOOSE TO MAKE  ALL  MY DREAMS COME TRUE...




   We don't know who will be our husband.We don't know who's our future children.We don't know how long we will alive here on earth.We don't know what is our future constant job.We  don't know what is yet to come.. We don't know who is willing to spend the remaining years with us.We don't know how long will they(friends) stick to us.We don't know if our success will be achieved or not.


                   

            Life is a question that answers itself ....


        Without fantasy and dreams,It is impossible to achieve the best of this life.Wishful thinking helps us to broke all the possibilities.I got lots of dreams , and it makes me more climbing,reaching those stars that i dreamed all this time.All dreams can come true .. if we have the courage to pursue them.The best reason of having dreams is that in dreams,no reasons are necessary.To accomplish great things,we must not only act,but also dream;not only plan,but also believe.If i can dream it,I can do it.InsyaAllah.And the wish is,may god bless my way.


Friday 5 August 2011

My late grandma

     I still remember,It was about a year ago when I was still in form 5.You was the only grandma that I had since I've lost my Chinese grandma few months before you passed away.You was such a loving grandma,you know how to cheer us with your silly jokes.I never knew that it was the last chance for us to celebrate our last Hari Raya with you,nek.You ate a lot of nasi impit,chicken curry,satay and lots of menu that my mom cooked for you.The red baju kurung suited you well.You looked so beautiful,years younger than your real age.I sat next to your seat,we ate together.We laughed so hard with my brother cause we learned how to speak in Suluk's language from you.It sounds weird cause we didn't know how to pronounce it well.

     I took a lot of pictures  together with you.It all ends happily after the Hari Raya.So i went back to Sandakan cause the big examination day was just around the corner.Suddenly my mom received a phone call from our aunty.She said grandma was in a bad condition.Grandma can't breathe well,she can't speak well.I was like "what the hell I'm not gonna believe this cause It's just couple of weeks ago she was in a great condition".My cousin said,doctor placed grandma to the female ward.Critically sick is the answer.

     We quickly packed our stuff,dad drove as fast as he can.As we arrived there,my heart was shattered to see her as she lay dying on the bed,calling our names one by one.Shines that always make her glowing faded away.She was totally weak.When I looked at the graphs , It was 50/50 to say that she could still stay or gone forever.It touched my heart when she tried to stop us to teach her to follow this "Asyaadualla ilahaillallah wa asyhaduanna muhammadarrasullullah..". She said , stop doing this,Allah already forgave me and He did accept me already.Tears ran down the cheeks...Sisters non stop reading the Yaasin,Ayat Kursi and stuff.We kissed her cheeks side to side,her forehead,her hands,we hugged tight.

    I bet you will never see a person who still remember your name,who still make some jokes and kiss you as she/he lays dying on the bed.But my grandma,she was a very strong women with a loving heart.The way she say goodbye to us is from her kisses,her smiles and her hugs.I don't know what I'm going to write actually cause words can't describe my feelings.I just miss her so much.She's the one that told us not to cry and wiped our tears.Don't you see how strong her heart is ? :'(


    She left us on that night,3am.Memories with you will never fade away,grandma.And grandma,Lord keep my memory green.I was there at the funeral.I cried,we cried too much to see you dressed with kain kafan..I still remember how sweet you smelled right after we bathed you with air sembilan.Your face shine bright although you wasn't good enough about our religion.You didn't pray five times a day but your kindness towards neighbors,friends,family and grandchildren makes Allah forgive you InsyaAllah.. I can feel something empty without you on this Ramadhan.. :( And you left us with your love,lasts forever.When there's no one dry your tears there,make my Al-fatihah do it for you ..

                             Everytime I miss you, I always give you my priceless present,Al Fatihah


                                                    Couple of months before she left us

                                                    That's her name on the board

                                                                         Talkin

                                                                    Its just near a lake




In memories of nek puan
Aminah binti Jalmani
AL FATIHAH ...
I MISS YOU